It’s not a hobby, it’s my full time job. There are only two people in my band... me and my son Wil. Wil plays the drums and he is a bit taller than me. So, since I was pretty short and fat, BIG and TALL sounded like a great name with a little visual gimmick.
A while back we had shirts made. My shirt said ‘BIG’, his said ‘TALL’. I got them for a photo shoot. They look cool, but the place that made custom shirts only went to 3XL... I wore a 5XL... but I squeezed into it and put it away in my closet (and forgot about it).
Yesterday we had a big theater gig. I wanted us to wear something cool, and I remembered we had these shirts. This is where my brain damage comes into the story...
I think I have some kind of brain damage now when it comes to my body image. Like, I know I’ve lost almost 100 lbs and INTELLECTUALLY I know I’m a size 3XL, not a 5XL, but... I still think I’m a 400 pound, 5XL hulk.
So when I tried on my "BIG" shirt, I totally expected it to be tight. But it wasn’t... brain damage.
Then I was deciding which pants to wear...
Again, I wanted us to look good, so I thought I’d wear my "good" black dress pants, which I haven’t worn in a while. These are the same pants that barely fit me at 400 pounds (thanks to the comfort fit stretch waist). See where I’m going with this? Brain damage.So I packed up my trusty old dress pants, (without trying them on) my (not so) BIG shirt, and headed to upper Michigan for a big theater show!
So, I’m in the motel room before the show, I put on my BIG shirt and then.... MY CLOWN PANTS!
Yep... they were big... not just in the waist, (which I expected) but the legs, thighs, butt... all I needed was a red nose, maybe big matching shoes and a little tiny car for me and thirty of my friends to jump out of! I brought a belt... thought the waist might be a little loose... a little loose... brain damage.
I did bring a back up pair of black pants that worked ok, but here is the point: If you have been really big like me for any length of time, it might take your damaged brain a while to catch up to your real, actual weight loss. You can probably do more things: walk farther, sit in the booth, and wear smaller sizes than you think.
I think eventually my brain will heal itself like the rest of my body, but until it does I need to remember to try on clothes before I pack them!
Oh, my, Billy! How funny! And so very true! Am so glad that you brought a back-up pair of pants! There's just no way that a belt could have redeemed those pants for you to be able to wear them!
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious Billy!! And I can relate. We recently had a family members funeral to attend. So we pulled the 'funeral Google's out of the closet!! Unlike you, we did try them on however! Yup! Way too big!! Thank God we had both had a plethora of sizes in the closet to choose from! It's a real struggle! But a good one to have!! Thumbs up to you! 👍
ReplyDeleteI've lost 100lbs and it still surprises me when I fit into an XL shirt and it amazes me when a LG looks even better. It took me a long time to buy smaller pants because I didn't have any idea about what size I was.
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